Jabroni of the Week: Metta World Peace

Posted: June 26, 2011 by Keith Stone in basketball, jabronis, Metta World Peace, NBA

Metta World Peace is a crazy motherfucker. Not only was he responsible for the biggest black eye in NBA history with the brawl in Detroit and his player profile on HoopsHype includes the line, “Goes very crazy very often,” but now he thinks he’s going to change the world. World Peace was originally going to go with Mr. One Love but obviously Metta World Peace would have a greater impact on the world. It didn’t work for World B. Free and it’s not going to work for World Peace.

Athletes need to learn their place in the world. There’s a select few that can change attitudes and trends around the world. Jordan was one of them. Not Metta World Peace. Sure, he won the Walter Kennedy Citizenship Award and there’s a lockout coming up. Peace on Earth is a nice goal, but maybe volunteering with some kids in South Central or Queensbridge would be a little easier considering that World Peace should be training after getting swept by Dallas in the playoffs. I can see Kim Jong Il getting ready to launch some nukes when all of a sudden he thinks about World Peace’s crazy 3-pointer in Game 7 of the 2010 NBA Finals and reconsiders. Actually, maybe World Peace would stop that psycho.

Metta, baby, I know your name means happiness and your intentions are pure, but I just don’t know how much of this craziness I can take. Every time I hear something new about you I think it’s fake. It’s not. You’re falling of the face of the world, the very world you are trying to save. You’ve come a long way since you were punching fat white trash in Detroit. It’s possible you went too far. Then again, at least you’re trying to help world peace, World Peace. Try giving Kim Jong Il a call. Until then, you’re a jabroni, brother.

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