Archive for the ‘Fishsticks’ Category

Islanders-Capitals Game Sets Record For Most Promotions

Posted: November 10, 2011 by Keith Stone in Fishsticks, hockey, NHL

The guy running the Mets’ marketing team must also work for the Islanders. At Saturday’s game against the Capitals, the Fishsticks did everything they could to get spectators in the door. To start the game, an Air National Guardsman repelled from the ceiling to drop the opening faceoff. That’s gimmicky enough, but wait, there’s more! During the second intermission, Bachelorette Season 7 winner and huge Islanders fan JP Rosenbaum took to the ice to show how to play the team’s Mohegan Sun Time To Shine game. Any ladies that were interested in joining him were invited to tweet the reason why they deserved the right, nay, privilege to do so.

As fate would have it, the Isles won 5-3, but remember Fishstick fans, if the 4-6-2 record or eight-goalie rotation wasn’t enough to lure you to the game, make sure to stop by the Nassau Mausoleum to see dudes flying from the ceiling and reality show rejects. Why else would you go to a hockey game?

Islanders Sink To New Low

Posted: September 7, 2011 by Keith Stone in Fishsticks, hockey, NHL, tattoos

Looking to maximize revenue out of sponsorships and the swanky Nassau Mausoleum, the Fishsticks have named Tattoo Lou’s as their official tattoo parlor for the upcoming season. The deal includes a tattoo and piercing booth at the arena for ten home games. This is great news for douchebag Long Islanders who have to choose between going to the game or getting some more tribal bands. And why not bring the old lady to a game? Nothing says class like getting a tramp stamp of the logo a last place hockey team. The minimum price for a tattoo is $60, or a few go-rounds at the tanning salon. John Tavares should totally get some Fishsticks ink on his face. Now that would be intimidating. No word on whether the sponsorship will last when the team moves to Quebec City.


Isle Be Seeing You

Posted: August 3, 2011 by Keith Stone in Fishsticks, hockey, Long Island, NHL

Nassau County had a special referendum Monday to vote on whether property taxes should be raised in order to fund a new arena for the Islanders. It failed. Good for the people of Nassau County for not spending money they don’t have on an arena. Too bad for the Fishsticks the vote was held on a Monday. The B&T douchebags were probably too tired from heading to the City over the weekend and pretending to be New Yorkers to hit the polls. The area already has arenas in Manhattan, Newark, and the Meadowlands with one on the way in Brooklyn. We don’t need another one, especially with all the economic problems the state has been having.

The Isles’ current albatross of a lease lasts until 2015 and the team has stated that they will honor it despite unfavorable terms. However, past that their future is very much in doubt, especially in Nassau County. A lot of people have been throwing out Queens as an option but that’s even worse than Nassau. It’s far from the Islanders’ existing fan base, the public transportation isn’t much besides the 7 train and minimal LIRR coverage, and again, there’s already too many arenas in New York.

The Brooklyn arena would seem like a logical solution but it’s built for basketball and apparently would have the smallest capacity in the NHL. I feel like that’s a problem Mikhail Prokhorov could fix, though. Why couldn’t he buy the team? Even if they didn’t make too much money, it would boost the status of his new digs. It’s not like he’s hurting for cash, plus the building is already going up and it has a ton of transportation. It also maintains the existing Rangers-Islanders rivalry, which is nice but maybe a bit overrated.

If the New York area can’t handle a third hockey team, there are many markets that would be willing to give it a chance from Quebec City to Kansas City. As a Rangers fan, I won’t be crying if the Fishsticks move away. I’ll help them pack their bags, but it’s never good to see an established team with a championship pedigree move. At the same time, this situation has been simmering for a while and will hopefully result in a better situation for both the team and league. The best thing for everybody is a quick resolution.