Heat Nation Responds To Celebration-Gate

Posted: June 5, 2011 by Keith Stone in basketball, NBA, NBA Finals

Dat Roro Kid couldn’t take Rory’s comments about Game 2 lying down. Here’s what he had to say. He writes erotic fan fiction about LeBron James at Miami Heat Nation.

Some people may reference a concept called ‘taunting’ in the Game 2 loss to the Mavericks.  That’s a fairly hilarious notion.  It’s mythical.  It’s like a rainbow-colored unicorn flying across your bedroom ceiling in the middle of the night.  REAL taunting occurs in pre-game introductions.  Like, in say, Game 1 when we blasted Cee-Lo’s ‘Fuck You’ during the Mavs pre-game lineup intros.  And sure enough…one by one…those eventual losers strut out summarily to assembly line high-fives and deliciously-chagrined mugs.  As a Heat fan, it was LAUGHABLE.  They just sat there and ate it.  We were telling them ‘FUCK YOU’ right in their faces and they took it!!!  THAT WAS GAME ONE!  Even better was our own team coming out to “Fuck Them Otha N*ggas”.  And we did.  WE FUCKED THEM VERY HARD.

So if you want to assign Game 2’s win to some kind of revenge for ‘taunting’ (‘taunting’ being a celebratory BIG FUCKING SHOT WHEN WE’RE UP BY 15 WITH 6 MIN TO GO AND D-WADE HOLDING HIS ARM UP AFTER A HUGE CORNER 3), then please go ahead.  As Miami Heat Nation, we don’t really mind.  We’ve been dogged all year for any single thing we do and it is only motivation you give us to kick the Mavs’ ass in the Finals and dominate the NBA for the next 5 years.  If maybe you weren’t some wet-behind-the-ears child, you might know that what actually occurred on the court was a series of defensive breakdowns.  The Miami Heat are first and foremost a defensively stout team and without said defense there is no way to get the transition points that allow them to dominate consistently when they are hitting on all cylinders.  There was a lack of focus there but I ASSURE YOU that whatever ‘taunting’ has been addressed on this here site was not the case.  Why didn’t they come out GUNS BLAZIN’ when we basically told them FUCK YOU in Game 1?  Isn’t that the worst taunt imaginable?? Certainly more than D-Wade holding up his arm after a huge 3 (which he is typically poor at hitting if you actually knew anything about the Heat at all).

But, I digress, I’m happy for “celebration-gate”.  It’s only more motivation to dominate the fuck out of the NBA for years and years to come.  Come along for the ride or shut the fuck up on the sidelines.

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