Jabroni of the Week: Mexican Paramedics

Posted: January 15, 2012 by Keith Stone in jabronis
Tags: , ,


Ay caramba! You’re telling me that when transporting a fucking heart, the best these guys could do was a little cooler with wheels? That’s the same thing I bring to the beach. And did these guys need to jog with the cooler, like the patient was going to die in the next 30 seconds? From the looks of it, the hombre on the left does a lot more burrito eating than jogging. We couldn’t get them a segway or a golf cart or even just secure the lid with some tape or something? The best part is when the heart falls on the ground the two guys don’t even inspect it or discuss it, they pick it up and toss it back in the cooler like it’s the norm in Mexico. Heart fell in the middle of the road? Just throw it back in, Jose.

It’s not like Mexicans have enough stereotypes to worry about. I’m just surprised there wasn’t a mariachi band playing as these chanchos made their way from the helicoper. Sometimes you hear that healthcare is better in third-world countries than in America but after seeing this, I’d rather pay sky-high premiums on my health insurance than have to deal with my new corazon covered in burro shit.

Mexi medics, bebés, I know that you guys were only trying to do your best Speedy Gonzales impression but come on, with that drop do you think you’re on the Packers or something? Even LeBron James is making fun of you for how un-clutch you are. Transporting the heart shouldn’t be harder than transplanting it. Get it together, chicos. And make sure to wash your hands with bottled water before the procedure. Until then, you’re a jabroni, brother.

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