Posts Tagged ‘Miami Heat’

Knicks 89, Heat 87. Heat lead series 3-1

Rejoice, 11-year-old Knick fans! You have seen your team win a playoff game! Amar’e and Melo came up big today. I formally accept the apology of Amar’e Stoudemire after he came out and played like a man. The Knicks looked like a team that wasn’t ready to go home for the summer and that’s all you can ask for. Most importantly, they played with pride and with the Garden behind them, there was no way they were losing. Here are some random thoughts:

– It’s going to be tough with only Mike Bibby and Toney Douglas at the point but that’s no reason to rush Lin back. You can’t risk a major injury on the off chance that the Knicks can come back from three down to beat the Heat.

– The refs once again called a horrible game. If Queen James is driving down the lane and shoves Landry Fields as he’s making his move, it should an offensive foul. You can’t push somebody with your off hand if they get in your way.

– I’m not a fan of the “Beat the Heat” chant at the Garden. Isn’t that kind of acknowledging that the Heat are superior? We don’t need special chants for our opponents unless it’s “[insert name here] sucks.”

– Again, I never thought the record was a huge deal but it felt great getting the win out of the way so there’s no need to think about it ever again. Now we can just worry about playing hard. If the Knicks had lost Game 4, I would have said the season was a failure, but now there’s a (very small) foundation of positivity that can be built on. Little by little, the Knicks’ stigma of losing and the stink of Isiah Thomas is going away, and it’s going to be easier to attract talent and eventually contend for a Title. Right now, I’m just a happy fan.

Heat 87, Knicks 70. Heat lead series 3-0

I was pleased with the way the Knicks played. I know they lost by 17 and put up a stinker in the fourth quarter, but what do you expect? Three starters are out, they’re playing what should be the best team in the NBA, and Melo was off. The D and effort was there, mainly in the first half. Guys like J.R. Smith and Mike Bibby were holding their own, but when Jorts is in a do-or-die playoff game, things are not going to end well. The fact is the Knicks need Melo to go off to win a game and with nobody else in the lineup able to score, the Heat can harass him. They may be bitches, but they’re not stupid.

I don’t give a shit about the record. Who cares how many playoff games you win or lose in a row? We don’t have any rings and that’s all that matters. It’s a different team that lost to the Raptors and Nets. If we won a game in 2004, it wouldn’t really make any difference. I wish people would shut up about it. The take away from this game is that the Knicks aren’t going down easy. Also, how does Queen James have any fans outside of Miami after all the whining he does after every call against him? He’s really upping the crybaby antics. They’re at a Sidney Crosby-level. He better watch himself because the refs don’t take kindly to that. I prefer the Jordan death stare but maybe I’m just old school.

Heat 104, Knicks 94. Heat lead series 2-0

Well, it looks like Amar’e might be out for the rest of the series after punching a fire extinguisher case. As if things couldn’t get worse. Now we might be trying to avoid the record for consecutive playoff losses AT THE GARDEN without one of our big guns. Of course he’s pissed, he only had nine shots. J.R. Smith had 11 and Melo took 26. Somebody is going to have to change the way this offense works. Either the coach or the GM. You can’t have one of the stars of the team punching things because he’s not getting enough shots in a playoff game. Amar’e has to know better too. He’s battled injuries his whole career. The last thing he should be doing is being reckless with his body. There’s only one thing that’s going to cheer me up after this.


Heat 100, Knicks 67. Heat lead series 1-0

Look, we got beat. Beat down. That’s not what I want to talk about. How big of a bitch is LeBron James acting like he’s been shot every time somebody touches him? It’s like Albert Einstein cheating on a high school physics test. He’s the best player in the world and he has to resort to bullshit like that. It’s insulting as a basketball fan. If you’re going to beat us, I’ll take it like a man. Just bring it, baby. But don’t be flopping out there like you’re Julia Roberts in Erin Brockovich. Do you think Jordan, Ewing, Hakeem, Barkley, Magic, or Bird would throw their hands in the air like that after the Chandler screen? No fucking way.

The Knicks played terribly. Obviously, they’re facing long odds but Melo needs to get his game under control, Chandler needs some chicken soup, and we need to get Shump a new knee. Other than that, I would say things are looking up. It might also help if the refs didn’t call a foul against the Knicks for breathing on Queen James when we’re taking it to the rack and getting hammered and nothing is called. How does one team shoot 22 more foul shots than the other? Earl Hebner has had better days than the refs had during Game 1. It’s just a good thing the Rangers are doing so well or I’d be more upset. This video also gives me the strength to go on.

Is LeBron James Still An Eunuch?

Posted: March 3, 2012 by Keith Stone in basketball, NBA
Tags: , , , ,


Yeppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp. Winners always want the ball when the game is on the line.


Yepppppppppppp. Look, you have three options here:

A. Shoot a 3 and end the All-Star Game in the most badass way possible. If you miss, who cares? It’s the All-Star Game.

B. Drive to the basket. You probably can get a decent shot or get fouled, although you might get killed by your fellow players for allowing the game to go on any longer.

C. Pass the ball into traffic. This will not only reemphasize all the criticisms you’ve heard all year, but is a really bad play strategically. How is it that a guy like Jeremy Lin who’s played in like 15 games has the cojones to take a game-winning shot when all the attention is on him but the Queen passes like the puss that he is? It’s an exhibition game. Be a man and take control. It’s like Coach Jimmy McGinty says, “Winners want the ball in their hands when the game is on the line.” Not a surprise LeBron passed it.

LeBron James Can’t Cut His Own Food

Posted: February 24, 2012 by Keith Stone in basketball, NBA
Tags: , , , ,

Maybe I’m just bitter that the Heat beat the Knicks last night. Either way, this new story about Queen James is hilarious. Apparently, the Queen likes to have his food to be pre-cut when he orders it at restaurants, according to one of his favorite servers at XO Steakhouse in Cleveland. Even worse, it was revealed that he orders his steak well done. This story is corroborated by another server who claimed that the Queen ordered his spaghetti pre-cut.

I guess I understand the steak thing because I used to like it pre-cut when I was 7. I know the Queen didn’t have a normal childhood but somewhere between the million-dollar contracts and chilling with Warren Buffett, somebody probably should have taught him to cut his own food. Isn’t that what Dwyane Wade and Pat Riley are for? They probably promised to keep cutting his food for him so he’d move down to Miami. I just don’t get why he needs his spaghetti cut up. Half the fun is slurping it up into your mouth. I know it’s not classy but it’s still not as bad as asking somebody to cut it for you. I wonder what goes through a grown man’s head when he asks somebody to cut their food for him. Half the time I’m too embarrassed to ask for nachos without sour cream. Maybe I was wrong about LeBron. If he has the courage to ask a total stranger to cut his food, maybe he does have the courage to take a shot in the fourth quarter.

Cleveland Frowns