The Maxim Hot 100 List Is Garbage

Posted: May 8, 2011 by Keith Stone in chicks, Maxim, ridiculous

The Maxim Hot 100 is always good for a laugh. Although Rosie Huntington-Whiteley is a very solid pick for #1, it seems like the list was created by seventh graders (maybe since it’s Maxim’s target demo). Where’s Amber Lancaster? Where’s Amber Heard? Was there some sort of ban against hot chicks named Amber? I get that Olivia Munn likes video games and Star Wars and she’s pretty cute, but #2?!?!?!?!? Is she hotter than January Jones? Brooklyn Decker was #36! Any list in which Brooklyn Decker is #36 is flawed. There are simply not 35 other chicks that are hotter than Brooklyn Decker in the world. It’s like saying The Beatles are the 36th greatest band of all-time.

Don’t even get me started with Anne Hathaway at #7. Yeah, she does sex scenes but she looks like a girl I would meet waiting for the L train. Cameron Diaz #4? Anna Kournakova #19? Is it 1998? I’m all for honoring the hall-of-famers but it’s time for those two to step aside gracefully, unlike Willie Mays with the Mets. Then, there’s the chicks that haven’t done anything all year. Hilary Duff is a cutie at #40, but has she done anything for the last three years besides marrying that loser Mike Comrie? Give me a little relevance. Erin Andrews is #91 but she actually has a job.

If you’re keeping track at home, there’s eight Dayyyyyyyyyyyyuuuuuuuuuuuuum Girls in the Hot 100 (or Hot 99 Plus Anne Hathaway) so it wasn’t totally horrible. I’d like to see more focus on physical hotness on next year’s list as opposed to who’s the biggest cocktease. Katy Perry at #3, anyone? Here’s my top 10 list from the Hot 100:

1. Brooklyn Decker
2. January Jones
3. Odette Annable
4. Kelly Kelly
5. Megan Fox
6. Rosie Huntington-Whiteley
7. Dania Ramirez
8. Eva Mendes
9. Scarlett Johansson
10. Lauren Storm

Maxim

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