Archive for the ‘ridiculous’ Category

Serious Question

Posted: December 18, 2011 by Keith Stone in cars, Paul Stender, ridiculous

Is Paul Stender the coolest guy of all-time? He’s an old ass farmer dude who put a fucking cruise missile on top of a 1967 Chevy Impala. Now he can get the beater up to 300 MPH. Plus check out his wife. I need to move down south. The cowboy boots do it for me.



Posted: November 14, 2011 by Keith Stone in crime and punishment, ridiculous

The economy sucks. It’s hard enough to find a job and make some money. Insurance companies are always ripping people off, so why not rip them off, right? That was the idea this genius had. It’s just a shame he tried his plan on a police car with a camera on the dash.

And Now Let’s Hand Things Over To Weather…

Posted: November 11, 2011 by Keith Stone in ridiculous, The Ukraine

Everyone loves jacking it at work. It’s a way to get back at The Man. I jack it like eight times a day writing these posts for you. I just jacked it right now. However, most of us aren’t required to do a live newscast as part of our work. This newscaster from the Ukraine found out the hard way that sometimes the producer throws it back to you a little early. I wonder if he was thinking about that stripper or if her American flag outfit got him excited about freedom. Make sure that hand is clean, buddy!

Oh Jeeze

Posted: November 8, 2011 by Keith Stone in college football, Penn State, ridiculous

This is the autobiography of the coach accused of sexually assaulting children at Penn State. It is not photoshopped. If you’re a child molester, you CANNOT name your autobiography Touched.

Welcome To Pee Your Pants High

Posted: October 27, 2011 by Keith Stone in ridiculous, school, the kids

“If peeing your pants is cool, consider me Miles Davis.”

Brooklyn’s Science Skills Center High School is coming under fire for closing every bathroom in the school except for one located in the nurse’s office, causing waits of up to 20 minutes to take a simple piss. That’s one bathroom for 634 students! SSCHS has had problems with violence and bullying, with students even setting fires in the bathrooms in the past, but then again, when you gotta go…

A young student named Kianna complained, “It was awful, and not just the smell or the line. It was the pee all over the place and the terrible plumbing.” I feel your pain, Kianna. Actually, wait, no I don’t. I’m a guy. A Dept. of Education spokesman claimed that the single baƱo situation lasted only for one day, but that comment was rebuffed by more than 20 students.

This isn’t communist Sweden. It is every kid’s right to be able to waste time in any bathroom they choose. Why can’t they just get a security guard or have a few teachers with a free period roaming the halls? These kids need to band together to break the administration. At my high school, somebody drew a swastika in one of the bathrooms and they put all these restrictions on leaving class. We protested and they relented. The Bloods, Crips, nerds, popular kids, gays, and goths of SSCHS have to do the same. I know it’s tough, but do it for all the other schools, do it for your bladders, and most of all, do it for America. Hit the music…

NY Daily News

Try losing 40 pounds first.

Whatcha Looking At?

Posted: October 12, 2011 by Keith Stone in Kim Jong-Il, North Korea, ridiculous

Being Supreme Leader of the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea is hard work. It’s not all dispatching airplanes to China to pick up McDonald’s and watching vintage Swedish porn. The reason that North Korea is one of the best countries to live in is that Kim Jong-Il singlehandedly inspects all means of production, you name it. Giant cucumbers? Check. Umbrellas? No question. Weapons-grade biochemicals? All in day’s work. His exploits are chronicled at Kim Jong-Il Looking At Things. If only Obama took his job as seriously.