Nic Cage Is A Vampire

Posted: September 28, 2011 by Keith Stone in Nic Cage, ridiculous, Twilight Saga

If there’s one thing I’ve learned over the years, it’s that you should always believe everything you read on the Internet. Jack Mord is an antiques dealer who has discovered the secret of Nic Cage’s success: he’s an immortal vampire. Mord’s proof is a photo from the 1800’s that he believes depicts Cage. He says that the actor reinvents himself about every 75 years and might eventually come back as “a politician, the leader of a cult, or a talk show host.” Montel Williams, I’m on to you!

Of course Nic Cage is a vampire. How do you think he’s survived all the flops he’s made over the past few years? Mord is now selling the photo on eBay for $1 million, which knowing how obsessed people are with vampires, will probably sell faster than you can say “Team Edward.” Unfortunately for Mord, vampires cannot be photographed. I learned that from an episode of Are You Afraid of the Dark? Also, I don’t think vampires need hair plugs.

ABC News

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s