Yeppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp. Winners always want the ball when the game is on the line.
Archive for the ‘NBA’ Category
Is LeBron James Still An Eunuch?
Posted: March 3, 2012 by Keith Stone in basketball, NBATags: basketball, eunuch, Miami Heat, NBA, Queen James
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Trivia Time: Wilt Scores 100
Posted: February 29, 2012 by Keith Stone in basketball, NBA, triviaTags: basketball, Knicks, NBA, trivia, Wilt Chamberlain
This week marks the 50th anniversary of Wilt Chamberlain’s 100-point game against the Knicks. Not bad for someone who literally stood head and shoulders taller than the competition. By the end of the game, Chamberlain’s Philadelphia Warrior teammates were fouling the Knicks to get the ball back in the hands of the Dipper. A little cheap, but it still doesn’t diminish the magnitude of the accomplishment. However, only 4,124 fans were in attendance at the neutral site for one of the greatest nights in basketball history. That brings us to our Question of the Week. Get it right and Wilt’s corpse will make you 20,001. The answer, as always, is after the jump.
Where was Wilt Chamberlain’s 100-point game played? (and a hint: it is not Flint, Michigan)
The Knicks Are A Regular *NSYNC
Posted: February 29, 2012 by Keith Stone in basketball, NBATags: basketball, Iman Shumpert, Knicks, Landry Fields, NBA
At a fan event this week, Landry Fields belted out a surprise singing performance to Billionaire with a Knick twist. Who knew he had pipes like that? He’s a regular Justin Bieber. Iman Shumpert followed it up with a little freestyling. If Steve Novak was there, maybe he could have done classic Guns N’ Roses. He strikes me as the type of guy who would kill it doing Welcome to the Jungle on karaoke night. At least the Knicks could fall back on a Grammy if they don’t win the Title this year.
Is LeBron James Still An Eunuch?
Posted: February 26, 2012 by Keith Stone in basketball, NBATags: All-Star Game, basketball, Miami Heat, NBA, NBA All-Star Game, Queen James
Yepppppppppppp. Look, you have three options here:
A. Shoot a 3 and end the All-Star Game in the most badass way possible. If you miss, who cares? It’s the All-Star Game.
B. Drive to the basket. You probably can get a decent shot or get fouled, although you might get killed by your fellow players for allowing the game to go on any longer.
C. Pass the ball into traffic. This will not only reemphasize all the criticisms you’ve heard all year, but is a really bad play strategically. How is it that a guy like Jeremy Lin who’s played in like 15 games has the cojones to take a game-winning shot when all the attention is on him but the Queen passes like the puss that he is? It’s an exhibition game. Be a man and take control. It’s like Coach Jimmy McGinty says, “Winners want the ball in their hands when the game is on the line.” Not a surprise LeBron passed it.
LeBron James Can’t Cut His Own Food
Posted: February 24, 2012 by Keith Stone in basketball, NBATags: basketball, food, Miami Heat, NBA, Queen James
Maybe I’m just bitter that the Heat beat the Knicks last night. Either way, this new story about Queen James is hilarious. Apparently, the Queen likes to have his food to be pre-cut when he orders it at restaurants, according to one of his favorite servers at XO Steakhouse in Cleveland. Even worse, it was revealed that he orders his steak well done. This story is corroborated by another server who claimed that the Queen ordered his spaghetti pre-cut.
I guess I understand the steak thing because I used to like it pre-cut when I was 7. I know the Queen didn’t have a normal childhood but somewhere between the million-dollar contracts and chilling with Warren Buffett, somebody probably should have taught him to cut his own food. Isn’t that what Dwyane Wade and Pat Riley are for? They probably promised to keep cutting his food for him so he’d move down to Miami. I just don’t get why he needs his spaghetti cut up. Half the fun is slurping it up into your mouth. I know it’s not classy but it’s still not as bad as asking somebody to cut it for you. I wonder what goes through a grown man’s head when he asks somebody to cut their food for him. Half the time I’m too embarrassed to ask for nachos without sour cream. Maybe I was wrong about LeBron. If he has the courage to ask a total stranger to cut his food, maybe he does have the courage to take a shot in the fourth quarter.
Martell Webster Throws Down Game-Losing Dunk
Posted: February 24, 2012 by Keith Stone in basketball, NBATags: basketball, dumbass, Martell Webster, Minnesota Timberwolves, NBA
Down by 3 with less than five seconds left, the T-Wolves needed a miracle to send their game against the Nuggets into overtime. Despite the fact that Milt Pilacio was unavailable (cut to Rory nodding glumly), Martell Webster got the takeaway they needed but cruised in for an easy dunk instead of a game-tying 3. While everyone in the arena from his teammates to the color guy was shocked, Martell failed to notice that the defenders didn’t really put up much of a fight once he crossed the arc. Of course, there was too little time to do much else and Minny lost. What can you say except at least the kid has a sweet mohawk.
The New Orleans Hornets Are Officially An ABA Team
Posted: February 14, 2012 by Keith Stone in basketball, NBATags: basketball, NBA, New Orleans Hornets, Will Ferrell
Nothing says the 80’s quite like Will Ferrell, an actor who was born in the 60’s, starred in several movies taking place in the 70’s, rose to fame in the 90’s, and became a superstar in the 00’s. That’s why the New Orleans Hornets (they still exist?) invited Ferrell to introduce the starting lineups for their game against the Bulls as part of their 80’s Night promotion. Although he did the same thing in Semi-Pro, the results were still pretty freaking hilarious. I would’ve liked to see him introduce the ball girls, though. And is it just me, or is Trevor Ariza not enjoying his time in the Big Easy?
I Wonder What That Conversation Was Like
Posted: February 2, 2012 by Keith Stone in baseball, basketball, MLB, NBATags: baseball, basketball, Dikembe Mutombo, MLB, NBA, Yogi Berra
When one thinks of great Yankee catchers, a few names come to mind. Yogi Berra. Thurman Munson. Dikembe Mutombo? The retired NBA star was at the 32nd Annual Thurman Munson Awards (Tebow knows why) and posed with Yogi, Mrs. Yogi, and Munson’s widow, Diana. According to Guinness, it is now officially the most awkward interaction in human history. I imagine it went something like this.
Mutombo (in Cookie Monster voice): Izz e prezzere ta mit yuuuuu, Mussta Boora.
Yogi: What? You have to speak when you talk.
Do Not Take Advice From Kobe Bryant
Posted: February 1, 2012 by Keith Stone in basketball, NBATags: basketball, Kobe Bryant, Los Angeles Lakers, Metta World Peace, NBA
Kobe Bryant (yes, the guy who had to deal with a sexual assault case because he couldn’t resist the trinity) had some words for Metta World Peace (yes, the guy who was suspended for an entire season for charging into the crowd and attacking fans) after the Lakers’ scrappy recent win over the Clippers. He told World Peace “to be the person you were in Indiana.” Again, World Peace was so out of control in Indiana that he attacked a fan because somebody threw a drink at him. If that World Peace comes back, he’s going to clothesline Jack Nicholson for wearing sunglasses at a game. The Lakers have won three of four and are a game back in the Pacific Division, so maybe the Kobe System is working. Or maybe it’s the fact that World Peace admitted that “I got bored with defense because it was so easy to stop people over the years” but now he’s starting to come around. I mean, seriously, winning championships, making money, and being popular is so boring.
A Note To Knicks Fans
Posted: January 9, 2012 by Keith Stone in NBATags: basketball, Knicks, NBA, the fans
I never boo my guys. I know that they’re not always giving it their all and that sucks. I’ll yell. I’ll yell at them to run faster or pass the ball. I honestly like most of the players on the teams I root for, but I don’t like all of them. It still doesn’t stop me from cheering for them because they’re on my team. It’s just a personal choice. If you booed the Marbury/Curry-era Knicks, I don’t have a problem with it. They sucked and their effort and skill was less than stellar.
However, as a fan, you have to realize that booing doesn’t help your team. If you’re doing a Powerpoint at work and it sucks so you’re trying to fix it, do you think it would help if somebody was booing you WHILE you were working. Look, I know this is New York and this is a demanding town, but chill out with the early booing. Yeah, the Knicks played horribly against Toronto and Charlotte but if you really want the team to win, don’t fucking boo. I hate it.
And leave Toney Douglas alone. He’s a third-year guy and was picked 29th in the draft. What do you expect from him? He’s making about 1/20 of the salary as Carmelo Anthony. Its not like he’s a high-priced free agent that isn’t living up to his contract. He’s a kid that was thrust into the starting lineup but only because there was literally nobody else. Shumpert and Bibby might take his spot for now but don’t boo Toney Douglas because he misses a wide open three or dribbles the ball off his foot. And if you cheer louder than usual when he comes out, it’s still a slap in the face. Mistakes happen and the lockout didn’t help anybody, much less a young guy given a vast new responsibility. If you think he’s dogging it, then sure, give him shit. Otherwise, leave him alone.
Rainman Suite 