Posts Tagged ‘bOObs’

Six-Pack Challenge WEEK 7 – In the Pink

Posted: October 21, 2012 by Keith Stone in football, NFL
Tags: , , , ,
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I’m about to say something controversial so hold on. I love boobs. OK, that’s not the controversial part, but why do we have to watch an entire month of football where the players look like fucking Easter eggs? I know wearing pink is for breast cancer awareness but do we really have to celebrate it for a quarter of the season?

There are so many other causes. Let’s mix it up. Blue for prostate cancer. Orange for Chuckstrong. Heck, even go rainbow for gay rights. Let’s just agree that we’re only going to take a week or two every season and get all dressed up. It would have a much bigger impact anyway. The pink has run it’s course. Maybe it’s just that the Giants always play great in October and I’m sick of looking at highlights of Victor Cruz doing the salsa like he’s covered in cotton candy. Or maybe the Giants always play great in October because of the pink. Must be Eli’s favorite color. On second thought, I take everything I said back. Let’s make some picks.

CARDINALS AT VIKINGS (-6.5)
Stone: Vikings
Skelton/Kolb is the worst football duo since Finkle and Einhorn.

Slumdeezy: Cardinals
In honor of their about-to-be-in-the-World-Series baseball brethren.

DRK: Cardinals

Rory: Cardinals
I feel this is a bounce back game for the Kolb Klan.

DP Animal: Vikings
There’s nothing quite as engaging as a quarterback controversy where both options kind of suck.

Phanatic: Cardinals
This line confuses me.

RAVENS AT TEXANS (-6.5)
Stone: Ravens
Good teams don’t fall apart with the loss of one or two players.

Slumdeezy: Texans

DRK: Ravens

Rory: Texans
Those injuries on the Ravens won’t help them win.  I think.

DP Animal: Texans
Losing LaDarius Webb will hurt the Ravens more than losing Ray Lewis.

Phanatic: Ravens

COWBOYS (-2.5) AT PANTHERS
Stone: Panthers
The Cowbots always make me LOL.

Slumdeezy: Cowboys

DRK: Panthers

Rory: Panthers
Ha ha!  Keith wrote Packers instead of Panthers when he originally sent out the lines!  Take that!

DP Animal: Cowboys

Phanatic: Panthers
I hope I hope I hope.

JETS AT PATRIOTS (-10.5)
Stone: Jets
Somehow.

Slumdeezy: Patriots

DRK: Jets

Rory: Jets
I just don’t think the best team in the league is 10 points better than the worst team.  And these teams are neither the best nor the worst.

DP Animal: Patriots

Phanatic: Jets
10.5 is mean after last week.

STEELERS (-1.5) AT BENGALS
Stone: Steelers
Have we decided if the Steelers suck yet?

Slumdeezy: Steelers
Who knows?

DRK: Bengals

Rory: Steelers
I just think the Steelers are better.  But, hey, look at my gambling record.

DP Animal: Bengals
Oh AJ Green, you’re so good, and no one seems to care.

Phanatic: Steelers

LIONS AT BEARS (-6.5)
Stone: Lions
Now that everyone’s high on the Bears, it’s their turn to fall.

Slumdeezy: Lions

DRK: Lions

Rory: Bears
And the Bears are a very good team.  The end.

DP Animal: Bears
I think it’s time we all agreed that Matt Stafford isn’t very good.

Phanatic: Lions

CURRENT RECORDS
Stone: 20-16 (Last week: 3-3)
DP Animal: 18-18 (4-2)
Slumdeezy: 17-19 (3-3)
Rory: 16-20 (2-4)
Phanatic: 15-21 (3-3)
DRK: 13-23 (0-6)

Last week’s picks

All the Nips That’s Fit To Print

Posted: March 8, 2012 by Keith Stone in media
Tags: , , ,
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I know that the print industry has been hit hard, but if this is any indication about where it’s going, newspapers may not be completely dead. The New York Times published the above picture in an article about yoga last week. Look at the chick on the top right. It’s a nipple! There was a nipple in the Times. How has nobody noticed this? Now I know I’m a trendsetter but I didn’t think the newspaper of record would be copying The Suite after only a year. I figured it’d take at least a year and a half. What’s next? A Dayyyyyyyyyyyyuuuuuuuuuuuuum Girl on every page? You’d definitely have a lot more people reading the paper and being informed about current events. This is exactly what the country needs. I’d read Larry Flint’s Wall St. Journal.