WEEK 10 Picks: Value Added

Posted: November 13, 2011 by Keith Stone in 2011 NFL Picks, football, NFL

I hate shopping. If I need something, I go to the store and I get it. Mama Stone is the opposite. She would buy a sombrero if she thought she was getting a good deal for it. That’s why she has about 30 bottles of shampoo sitting in a closet. How could she not buy them? She had a coupon! Just because something is a good value does not make it a good purchase. Unless you’re Rapunzel, in this situation.

In our world, you might be tempted to make a pick because you’re getting an extra point or two. Oh goodie, the Jets line is only -1.5. Doesn’t matter because the Pats are going to blow them out. Taking the Jets is the equivalent of a chick thinking she got a good deal because she bought a pair of shoes on sale for $350 when they were listed at $500. She’s still an idiot and I still would want to tag her. And no, that doesn’t make me gay for Tom Brady. Picks!

STEELERS (-2.5) AT BENGALS
Stone: Steelers
The Bengals are a solid team, but they haven’t played anyone good this year.

Slumdeezy: Steelers

Rory: Steelers
Red Rocket vs. Big Ben in the battle of nicknames for your penis!

DP Animal: Steelers

Phanatic: Bengals

BRONCOS AT CHIEFS (-2.5)
Stone: Broncos
I’m convinced all four teams in the AFC West are going to end up at 8-8.

Slumdeezy: Broncos

Rory: Broncos

DP Animal: Broncos

Phanatic: Chiefs

JAGUARS (-2.5) AT COLTS
Stone: Jaguars

Slumdeezy: Jaguars

Rory: Jaguars
You know the deal at this point, folks.

DP Animal: Jaguars

Phanatic: Colts
The 10th wonder of the world will be the first win for the Colts!

BILLS AT COWBOYS (-5.5)

Stone: Bills
The Bills need to rebound after last week’s disappointment if they’re going to have a shot at the playoffs.

Slumdeezy: Bills

Rory: Bills

DP Animal: Bills

Phanatic: Bills

TEXANS (-2.5) AT BUCCANEERS
Stone: Texans
The Bucs are secretly not very good.

Slumdeezy: Texans

Rory: Buccaneers

DP Animal: Texans

Phanatic: Texans

TITANS AT PANTHERS (-3.5)
Stone: Titans
Hopefully, Chris Johnson’s holdout ends soon.

Slumdeezy: Titans

Rory: Titans
I don’t trust Cam Newton yet.

DP Animal: Panthers

Phanatic: Panthers
I just like Cam, OK?!

REDSKINS AT DOLPHINS (-3.5)
Stone: Redskins
The Dolphins suck at home.

Slumdeezy: Redskins

Rory: Dolphins

DP Animal: Dolphins

Phanatic: Redskins

SAINTS AT FALCONS (PICK)
Stone: Falcons
The Saints go up and down more than Oprah’s weight.

Slumdeezy: Saints

Rory: Saints

DP Animal: Saints

Phanatic: Saints

RAMS AT BROWNS (-2.5)
Stone: Rams
This is how I feel thinking about this game.

Slumdeezy: Rams

Rory: Rams
In case you aren’t following my fake Supercontest picks, I picked this game.  I have a feeling I’ll go 5-0 or 0-5 this week.  FYI – if I was in the Supercontest, I’d be in 28th place.  My opponent Brad?  He’d be in 512th place (there are 517 players).

DP Animal: Browns

Phanatic: Browns

RAVENS (-6.5) AT SEAHAWKS
Stone: Seahawks
I just can’t tell with Flacco.

Slumdeezy: Ravens

Rory: Seahawks
I picked 3 NFC west teams this week, and that’s only because there’s no Cardinals line.  I feel sick/great.

DP Animal: Ravens

Phanatic: Seahawks

LIONS AT BEARS (-2.5)
Stone: Bears
Who saw Matt Forte’s resurgence?

Slumdeezy: Bears

Rory: Lions

DP Animal: Bears

Phanatic: Lions

GIANTS AT 49ERS (-3.5)
Stone: Giants

Slumdeezy: Giants

Rory: 49ers
This has all the makings of a let-down game for the Giants.  However, my friend, who is both the biggest Giants fan AND alcoholic I know, will be attending this game.  I think he’ll be the X-factor in any Giants victory.  If some fat guy comes out and blocks a Niners field goal, don’t say I didn’t warn you.

DP Animal: Giants

Phanatic: 49ers
This is the kind of game the Giants lose after a game against the Pats.

PATRIOTS AT JETS (-1.5)
Stone: Patriots
You won’t like Tom Brady when he’s angry.

Slumdeezy: Jets

Rory: Patriots
This reminds me of when the Celts were playing the Knicks in the playoffs.  I hate both teams.  Speaking of which, I remember watching Game 2 at a bar.  When Jared Jeffries hit a layup to give the Knicks a slight lead, some fan at the bar shouted “PAT-RICK EWING!”  Knicks fans are awful.

DP Animal: Jets

Phanatic: Patriots

VIKINGS AT PACKERS (-13.5)
Stone: Vikings
Vikings have been playing better since McNabb was benched. This’ll be a shootout.

Slumdeezy: Packers

Rory: Packers
And…..I miss basketball.

DP Animal: Vikings

Phanatic: Packers

*The Cardinals-Dream Team game has no line at the time of this post. John Skelton, baby.

CURRENT RECORDS
Stone: 73-55 (Last week: 8-6)

Rory: 70-58 (9-5)
Slumdeezy: 66-62 (7-7)
Phanatic: 61-67 (6-8)
DP Animal: 61-67 (7-7)

Last Week’s Picks

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