Vince McMahon spent weeks training for the 1999 Royal Rumble. After being beaten all over the Arrowhead Pond including the bathroom, yes the bathroom, Mr. McMahon emerged at the announce table. When his nemesis Stone Cold Steve Austin was left standing as the final competitor, it was McMahon vs. Austin for the umpteenth time but Mr. McMahon had the Corporate Champion on his side.
Archive for the ‘WWF’ Category
Wrestling Video of the Week: Mr. McMahon Wins the Royal Rumble
Posted: July 31, 2011 by Keith Stone in Slobberknocker, Stone Cold Steve Austin, videos, Vince McMahon, wrestling, WWF0
Wrestling Video of the Week: Punk Wins
Posted: July 21, 2011 by Keith Stone in CM Punk, Slobberknocker, videos, wrestling, WWFCM Punk beat John Cena this Sunday to win the WWF Title as he rode out into the sunset. I’m not sure if he’s coming back but for the past month Punk has made wrestling more compelling than it’s been for a while. Here he is winning his first Title, as Mr. Money in the Bank cashed in his opportunity right after Edge took a beating from Batista.
Wrestling Video of the Week: The Rock Responds
Posted: July 14, 2011 by Keith Stone in John Cena, Slobberknocker, The Rock, videos, wrestling, WWFJohn Cena has been taking shots at his WrestleMania XXVIII opponent The Rock over the past couple of weeks. Well, the Rock noticed and released a video in which he tore Cena to shreds for everything from being a hypocrite to having lame fans. It’s classic Rock. Nobody can incorporate “bloated transvestite Wonder Woman” into a rant better than he can. It also looks like he’s coming back to Madison Square Garden, where he had his first match, for Survivor Series. This feud is really getting personal. As Jim Ross would say, “Business is about to start picking up.”
Wrestling Video of the Week: Through the Barber Shop Window
Posted: July 7, 2011 by Keith Stone in Marty Jannetty, Shawn Michaels, Slobberknocker, The Rockers, videos, wrestling, WWFI just got a haircut so this video seems appropriate. There was some tension between the Rockers so they went on Brutus “The Barber” Beefcake’s Barber Shop to talk things out (by the way, the barber pole microphone is fabulous—Bob Barker must’ve been so jealous). It seemed like things were resolved but a superkick later, it was all over for the legendary tag team and Shawn Michaels sent Marty Jannetty on a trip through the barber shop window.
The Rock does everything better than a normal human being. He sings better. He fucks better. He even poses for pictures on theme park rides better. I always go for the thumbs up when I see the camera but you don’t become the People’s Champion by giving a thumbs up. The guy in the back wants no part of it. The Rock should slap him in the face.
Wrestling Video of the Week: Goldust Loves Booker and Sprewell
Posted: June 24, 2011 by Keith Stone in Booker T, Goldust, Slobberknocker, videos, wrestling, WWFWhen he was courting Booker T to be his tag team partner, there wasn’t anything Goldust wouldn’t do. So while Booker went to 7-11 to get his ritual pre-match Slurpee and spend time with some of his young fans, Goldust was busy putting together an “elaborate disguise” to fit in without attracting attention, sucka. I can’t even tell it’s Goldust. He’s like a ghetto Mrs. Doubtfire and the Spree jersey and visor are a nice touch. Gotta love JR at the end. “He’s goofier than a pet coon!” Who wouldn’t want a bite of Goldust’s wiener?
Wrestking Video of the Week: Shane McMahon Flies
Posted: June 18, 2011 by Keith Stone in Shane McMahon, Slobberknocker, videos, wrestling, WWFI’ve heard from the millions (AND MILLIONS!) It’s time to bring the Wrestling Video of the Week back. In 2001, Shane McMahon faced off against the Big Show in a Last Man Standing match. Despite some great dance moves, Shane was giving up about 300 pounds on Show. It’s kind of a disadvantage in a Last Man Standing match. There was only one way to overcome it as Shane climbed the Titantron and took to the friendly skies to defeat Show with a little assistance from Test and a camera stand.
Jason Reso AKA Christian won the WWF World Heavyweight Championship in a great ladder match against Alberto del Rio last Sunday to complete a lifelong dream after almost 20 years in the industry. Two days later, he lost the belt to Randy Orton.
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Finally, the Rock came back to Wrestlemania…and it wasn’t that great. The Rock himself was good. I enjoyed his intro and subsequent promos. I guess I was just expecting more. I wanted Rock overdose and I only got a hit, not counting his presence in the main event.
The undercard was up-and-down. I liked the Edge/Del Rio match but it was a little too short and never gained momentum. Mysterio/Rhodes and Punk/Orton were good matches with cool moves but I really didn’t care about either of them. Oh no, Cody Rhodes thinks he’s disfigured. Who cares? The eight-man tag was lame and lasted about 12 seconds. What a waste. The show must have been running long and the Sheamus vs. Daniel Bryan match never took place, which I was looking forward to.
Unfortunately, instead of that matchup, we were treated to Michael Cole vs. Jerry Lawler which went waaaaaaaaaay to long. Sure, it was nice to see the King put Cole into an ankle lock, but it was such a slow paced match. Couldn’t this have been on a Raw? Luckily, with Cole out commission, we got a JR-King reunion, which was one of the highlights of the show.
I was actually really impressed by Snooki (and Trish Stratus’s ass). It was another short match but it was legit. I was proud of Snooks with the finishing move.
Undertaker/Triple H was the match of the night. I liked that they went outside the ring and neither could finish the other off. Just when it seemed like H might end the streak, the Undertaker stole the win. It was the rare match in which the ending was in question.
And then there was The Miz vs. John Cena. It was a decent if unspectacular match and you knew the Rock would be involved somehow. It was just disappointing that the Rock played such a large role. You know he’s going to affect the match, but I didn’t want him to win it for the Miz. Then, for good measure, he lays the Miz out. Yeah, it was awesome but what was the point? Why would you want your champion and #1 attraction to get beat down by a guy who hasn’t wrestled in seven years on your biggest stage? There was no closure. A good Wrestlemania should have finality and tie up all the loose ends in a storyline that has been building for months. This one did not.
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I feel like Wrestlemania XXVII is going to be something special and the Rock isn’t just going to sit on the sidelines. How about after Cena wins the title back, he challenges Rocky for ultimate all-time supremacy? The publicity tomorrow would be enormous and The Rock does have a movie coming out. Just a hunch. Here are my predictions for the big matches:
Undertaker def. Triple H
Alberto Del Rio def. Edge (with possible Christian screwjob)
John Cena def. The Miz
The Rock def. John Cena
If I nail all four, I am the best there is, the best there was, and the best there ever will be.
Rainman Suite 