Archive for the ‘bOObs’ Category

Dr. Drew Performs His Most Important Procedure Yet

Posted: November 10, 2011 by Keith Stone in bOObs, Courtney Stodden, Dr. Drew
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Much maligned child bride Courtney Stodden has been roundly criticized for her adult looks. Some might think the 17-year-old has been, um, surgically enhanced, but these types of bodily changes are natural for teenagers. Dr. Drew, like myself, does not like to see anyone take heat for things that are out of their control. Saint that he is, Drew magnanimously invited Court to be on his show Dr. Drew’s Lifechangers to prove that she’s as pure as the driven snow. To do this, she was given an ultrasound of her tits (in her heels, of course) by the upstanding Dr. John Diaz, who after much deliberation declared that our girl is 100% real grade-A beef. Thanks Dr. Drew! I knew I should have gone to med school.

The Saddest Day of the Year

Posted: November 2, 2011 by Keith Stone in bOObs, tragedy
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This is always the day I least look forward to. The best month of the year is over. Some of you may call it October. I know it simply as Breast Awareness Month. Let’s look back and remember the good times. Make sure to put your pink ribbons in a safe place for next year, kids.

Isn’t That Where the Flyers Play?

Posted: October 6, 2011 by Keith Stone in bOObs, good, hockey
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Breast cancer awareness month is taking over the world. Every player in the NFL is already wearing pink cleats, hats, gloves, you name it. Not to be outdone, Missouri State painted their ice pink. Either that or they play hockey on jello.

Deadspin

Let Them Babies Breathe

Posted: September 1, 2011 by Keith Stone in bOObs, chicks
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I’m a feminist. I think women should be treated equally to men. If they want to play football, let them play football (in lingerie). If they want to let their boobies hang out, then why the fuck shouldn’t they be able to? GoTopless.org (great website but NSFW) organized a series of protests around the country to argue that point two weekends ago. Then this weekend in Asheville, North Carolina, two obviously fascist former elected officials held a protest to protest the original protest. You with me here?

You’re thinking this is where freedom dies, right? In the name of liberty, two bastions of justice showed up at the anti-toplessness rally and bared their lovely and supple breasts to the crowd. Twenty-one year-old Molly Sarah Rosch took it a step further and took her pants off before she was arrested by the KGB, but I say she’s a hero. She’s like Martin Luther King, Jr., Gandhi, and Jenna Jameson all wrapped into one.

Jezebel

Look At the Bombs On This One

Posted: August 18, 2011 by Keith Stone in Australia, bOObs, da bomb
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Madeleine Pulver was studying for exams during her last year of high school in Sydney, Australia when a masked man entered her house and placed a bomb necklace on her. Terrifying, right? Luckily the bomb was revealed to be a fake and a suspect was apprehended in Kentucky (because who doesn’t commute between Australia and Kentucky?) so we can admire the real hero of the story: Madeleine Pulver and her amazing bombs.

BOOM. Girl must be eating some quality shrimp on the barbie. If the masked dude tried to put a bomb vest on her, there’s no way it would have fit. I’m just glad the bomb squad didn’t try to disable those bad boys. I’m not trying to make light of her ordeal but seriously, try to read the Post article without looking at her boobs. It’s impossible. Couldn’t do it for a million bucks. It took me about 20 minutes to read the entire thing. My eyes just kept drifting back to those puppies. Leave it to the Post to choose a picture for a serious article with the chick’s massive tits hanging out. I guess that’s why people still read it.

Happy Breastfeeding Week!

Posted: August 4, 2011 by Keith Stone in awesome, bOObs
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This is apparently Breastfeeding Week. I didn’t know until now but I’m not wasting any more time to celebrate. It’s is a special week, a time to be with your sweetheart and suck on her big old titties. Here’s something to enjoy in the meantime.

Is This A Boy Or A Girl? [NSFW?]

Posted: July 18, 2011 by Keith Stone in bOObs, soccer
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I was at the beach yesterday so I didn’t get to watch the Women’s World Cup Finals. When I was watching the highlights on ESPNEWS, they showed a crowd reaction shot where somebody lifted their shirt and their goodness was blurred out. I’m a big fan of nationally-televised boobies so I went on a quest to find them. Thanks to the miracle of technology and YouTube, I found the uncensored crowd reaction shot but I have to say I’m not quite sure what’s going on here. I haven’t been this befuddled since the Thai hookers in The Hangover 2. Leave it to the biggest event in women’s sports to have a moment of gender confusion like this. And yes, when Carmelo hits his first game winner at the buzzer this season, I’m taking my shirt off.

Happy Bikini Day

Posted: July 5, 2011 by Keith Stone in bikinis, bOObs
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Today is Bikini Day, the biggest holiday of the year, and the 75th anniversary of the greatest invention since the light bulb. We celebrate two great pioneers and geniuses, Louis Reard and Jacques Heim, for changing the way sluts go to the beach. This is dedicated to you guys. I love you.

 

Canucks 2, Sharks 0

Posted: May 19, 2011 by Keith Stone in bOObs, NHL, Stanley Cup Playoffs, Vancouver Canucks
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I’ve always said that Vancouver Canucks fans are some of the best out there. On top of being a major city with only one sports team (sorry BC Lions), it’s Canada and Canadians are crazy about hockey. Coverage of the NHL Draft makes the NFL Draft look like Nickelodeon. The Canucks have been in existence since 1970 and have never won the Stanley Cup, although the Vancouver Millionaires won it in 1915. They’re like the Red Sox and Cubs but without the Celtics and Bulls to soften the blow, respectively. In fact, the last time the Canucks made the Finals and lost in seven games to the Rangers, there was a full-fledged riot. This wasn’t a weak college-style riot. It was the real deal. Like in Philadelphia, except the participants were obviously better conditioned for maximum destruction.

So now with four first place finishes in the past five years and still no Cup, the fans are hungrier and crazier than ever. The Green Men heckle opponents in the penalty box and had the Canucks within three wins of a return to the Finals. Last night, they won again 7-3 over the San Jose Sharks, but the real news is that one of their fans may have put them over the top not only in their quest for the Cup, but in the discussion for best fanbase. Here she is, after the jump (NSFW).

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>Boobs McGee Attempts Suicide, In Coma

Posted: February 16, 2011 by Keith Stone in bOObs, ridiculous
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It’s not all fun and games in The Suite. Sometimes, you just need to cover the serious stuff. This is one of those times. Sheyla Hershey, formerly of the world’s biggest tits, is in a coma after intentionally overdosing on pills yesterday. She originally had MMM-size boobies but had them removed after contacting an infection. Hershey was scheduled to have KKK cups (racist!) re-implanted today. On reclaiming her crown, Hershey said, “Once I reclaim my identity as the World’s Biggest Boobs I can be a better role model for my daughter.” I can honestly say I wish there were more moms like her out there. Here’s wishing her a speedy recovery with more pictures:

The Sun
sheylahershey.net